How to Boil Water

I have become so reliant on technology. Sad, really. I remember when Neal was deployed for 6 months and we had to write letters. Not emails. LETTERS. Like with stamps and an envelope and two weeks of waiting... military mail moves a little slower than a snail. There was no email, let alone video chat. I also remember getting so peeved at people and "their cell phones." There was a time when I used to say, "I refuse to get a cell phone!" Me! The one with the Blackberry in the doctor's office giggling at Facebook posts and texting all my friends like a teenager... I used to say I would never have a cell phone. It's kind of funny that I was so ANTI technology for a minute considering my dad's work has always sort of been at the forward point of technological developments. He sold the first fax machine, we had the first car phones, they even tried to develop a pager watch in the 80's, fiber-optic phone lines, video phones, and now renewable fuel. We were of the first people to have the CD player, the VHS player (never the Beta - my dad was too smart to fall for that short lived advancement) and the DVD player. My husband has an iPhone, we have a Wii and my mom's car doesn't require a key. So the short stint to struggle against technological advancements was kind of odd for me! I am now being punished for it.

My microwave is broken.

Do you have any idea how hard life is when you don't have a microwave!? And it's not one of the counter-top jobs that you can just toss and get a new one. It's one of those over-the-stove deals that requires a repairman. He's coming Thursday. The microwave broke Saturday night. My kids have no idea what it's like to live in a world where food isn't ready in 30 seconds. They have no idea what it's like to live in a world where you flush your own toilet, pump soap with your hand, turn on the faucet using the hot and cold knobs and roll the silver handle on the paper towel roll to dry your hands! Okay, I admit it's not quite that bad yet, but it's close. I can already see the future conversations like, "when I was your age we had to cook our food, it wasn't delivered by a machine in the kitchen and we didn't have robot maids! We had to clean our own rooms! And we drove on roads, not in space ships." Did I watch too much The Jetsons as a kid? Perhaps. But you get my point. Back to the microwave.

I have a 10 month old who no longer nurses - she drinks formula. Typically I heat the water in the microwave and then add the powder. But now I actually have to get up at 6 in the morning to boil water! Well... I put water in the bottle warmer and turn it on, but I still have to wait 5 minutes for it to warm the bottle... now that I've said that "out loud" it sounds really stupid, but I can't deny the truth in it. Waiting 4 and a half minutes longer for a bottle just sucks. Also, my usual lunch is something from the freezer, a sandwich or soup. Two of the three require a microwave. Okay, that's not entirely true, but it feels true. What's the point of cooking a Lean Cuisine in the oven? I might as well cook in that case and that is just too much effort for the middle of the afternoon when you're already chasing a 3-year-old, a 10-month-old AND trying to pay attention to Days of our Lives! I am not Super Woman! I am flawed Liz who is desperately trying to figure out the best way to reheat my cup of coffee!! The mugs are too big for the bottle warmer... I tried.

My house is starting to feel like post WWII Germany.

That might be a wee bit on the dramatic side. We have bread... and money, albeit no a lot of it, and most of all electricity. But I will admit that it will be a long time coming for me to squawk about technology again. Unless my WiFi goes out...

Fall! (and football)

Fall is so close I can almost taste it and all of it's pumpkiny goodness. Of course they totally cheat here in the south because school starts in August so I get the fall bug early. August is not fall. August isn't even Fall's close relative. Hell, August isn't even Fall's third cousin by marriage on it's father's side. How they can justify starting school in the ugly, sweaty heart of summer is beyond me. Everyone knows you start school in early September when fall is so close by you can at least pretend! And you end it in June, not when you're still picking May flowers. We might as well have spring break in February. But I didn't want to write about the goofy school system and how they're blowing half their annual budget on air conditioning in the first month of school - I wanted to write about FALL!!!

Oh glorious Fall. The most wonderful time of year. My heart is swelling at the idea of pumpkin ice cream, pumpkin lattes, pumpkin rolls... oh, I can't wait!!! PUMPKIN FUDGE!!! Sorry... I'm just excited. Email me if you want the recipe for pumpkin fudge - it will blow your freakin' mind! Pumpkin is just one of the many things I'm looking forward to. Can you believe I'm actually excited to turn 33?! The 3rd annual Halloween Bash will be in full effect this year! Of course last year I was fully dilated. I've been tossing around costume ideas... I'm totally blank. I'll come up with something! All ideas are welcome... of course I probably won't use your idea, but it will surely point me in the right direction. The party will be at Bud's Pub & Garage this year - which means it will take place at the bar that has been built in my garage. I really need to do a blog about BP&G. It's a special place.

And since you are all AWESOME at math, you know that this Fall my lovely little baby will have her 1st birthday. Which is lovely and sad all at once. And right on the heels of my sweet little girls first bite of birthday cake will be the birth of my cousin's (who is more like my sister) first baby. And that is just lovely!

But what I'm REALLY excited about is FOOTBALL. Those of you that know me will know that I attended two colleges - The University of Oregon and the University of Tennessee. And even though the Ducks will always hold a special place in my heart - I am a Vol through and through. From my orange hair to my white blood cells. V-O-L-S go vols go! I am not ashamed to admit that I am drinking the Kiffin Kool-aid, either. (CLICK HERE if you need the back story)And it's totally not because he's smokin' hot, either. Okay... maybe it's a little bit because of that. I'm just about to jump out of my skin for the first game of UT football to see just exactly what it is we're made of under this new leadership. This will be my first year as a Tennessee Volunteer outside of the Phillip Fulmer era. I was not born here, was not raised a Vol - Phillip Fulmer is all I've known. I cried when they ousted him. But what's done is done and I'm not one to sulk over the things I cannot control (of course hiring a super hot coach that hates the Raiders as much as I do helps a lot in the non-sulking department). Just get into the season already and let's beat Florida and Auburn. Oh... and all the other games, too, but those two games specifically give me braggin' rights within my family. My brother went to Auburn and his lovely wife went to Florida and as long as I can mail them "sorry for your loss" cards after the game, I'm good. (Lee, if you're reading this I could really use a good card for this purpose - maybe a "way to fail" or something? Maybe the "after all these years" card will be appropriate this season... assuming we pull off the win)
If all this Tennessee football excitement wasn't enough, I'm having to experience two regime changes at the same time. The Denver Broncos gave my favorite coach Mike Tan-a-shan the boot and then quickly delievered Jay Cutler to Chicago in exchange for Kyle Orton... and somehow - NOT ON PURPOSE - I eneded up with both those guys on my fantasy football team. This should prove to be an interesting year for football fans... or at least Tennessee Vol fans that are also Denver Bronco fans... so for my husband and me... and Al Wilson. If there are others like us, I have yet to meet them.

This Fall is going to be the awesomest Fall yet! I hope you're prepared with your apple, cranberry or pumpkin recipes, your Halloween costume ideas, your baby gifts and your football orange (and blue on Sundays) or whatever your team's colors are! I know I am!!